Most of the time i like my versions better.
Sometimes i wonder if God's watching me and laughing at my pathetic attempts at change. I force myself to take small risks, make minor changes, just to see if it'll make a difference. A difference to what end im not sure, but for simplicity's sake let's say a difference to my destiny, the lifepath, my fate.
I like the idea of reincarnation, the only problem is that it doesnt fit in the islamic faith model. All im getting is a single attempt, one run and supposed to get it right the first time. Im a slow learner, therein lies my problem.
I actually just wanted to say that im thinking of doing Kendo. Im not sure if it's a good idea, if it is worth doing or why im even doing it. There's a famous quote somewhere that kinda goes "above all, be true to yourself". I think it's Hamlet. So, the truth is:
-i imagine i wont get anywhere with rowing
-i think kendo is cool (it's juvenile, but mentally i've not matured since 15)
-i'm in a japanese phase at the moment
-it's new and people in the team are nice
Worries:
-it's hard and im not fit
-there's lotsa equipment i need to get
-that i'll go nowhere with it, like rowing (i was so optimistic in the beginning)
-there's very few girls in the team
i think im gonna go with kendo, just because i went last week and told this nice girl i'll see her next week. Also, i have nothing better to do on a monday evening so why not mess about with heavy bamboo sticks?
oddly, this was inspired by the song about rowing on the lakes of canada.
My favorite, wrongly worded lines from the song:
look for me another day
i feel that i could change
oh laughing man
what have you done
dont tell me what cannot be done
my little heart
my winter lungs
dont tell me what cannot be done
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