Friday, September 28, 2007

Friendless and angry

I do realize that im a social retard with no friends, what i didnt realize is the extent of my anger. I have made enemies. I thought they were friends- i hoped that we were.But now that i've let the evilness out, i've made proper enemies, the kind i havent made in a while. I try not to pick fights- when you're a social retard you wanna keep what few friends you already have.

Like all major fights, this was a bad case of miscommunication and stubborness. Everything else i was willing to forgive. Not telling me anything, when you knew i had vested interest, is upsetting. What is infuriating is that you spent the whole evening with me. You talked to me. You knew it mattered a lot to me and i was losing sleep over it.
And they couldnt have the courtesy to wait, to ask, make a short phone call.

I think i kind of screamed at them on the phone. And hung up on someone. And argued face to face.

I hate it when people hate me. But i lost self control this time. Good thing i didnt spontaneously combust.

Sorry Big Guy Upstairs. I hope you'll give me strength and temperance.

3 comments:

csA* said...

"love with passion, hate with guts"

something cool i read on a friend's blog once and i think it's quite appropriate here

don't be afraid to hate with guts

:)

Liez said...

Hate with guts- that's a good one :P the thing about hating though, it requires a fair bit of self-confidence. Somehow im always racked with self-doubt.

I shall try and not be afraid, and to hate with all my guts!

Unknown said...

Hey!
It'll pass... and you'll be fine.
I mean heck, what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger right?
I mean, you've every right to how you feel, so why feel bad about it?
Love much!