I think i over-medicated today

I was so anxious at Kendo today. I was unbelievably twitchy and jumping all over the place.

It sucked. I still suck. Kinda lost a little confidence in myself today.

I hate this- if im off my meds i get lazy, and too much meds i got nuts and hungry. Yeah, these are the prescription meds im taking because i think i have a problem. The doctor doesn't think so, but hey, what do they know?

Yeah, maybe it's all in my head, but bloody hell, they make me feel better, so they must be working, right?

Yeah, maybe im not so happy, faking happy has a way of slapping me back in the face after the farce is over.

I hate being this pathetic person. There's more underlying this, but i'll elaborate when im feeling more eloquent and less like crap.

Later......like 2 in the morning later

Apart from being emotionally shitty, i can't walk properly because i have a massive (3x3 cm) blister on the ball of my left foot and a tiny (in comparison) blister on my right big toe.