I should be reading.

Or at least perusing a map. Something to guide me, show me the way. Im lost and scared. So unsure, so stupid.

Another weekend lost in a daze of Japanese food and cleaning bathrooms.

Im planning to start kendo again tomorrow. My knee is still sore at times, but i wanna go back. I believe in tough love anyway- i could use the exercise and i miss the way i feel after classes (high from exercise and a little smiley from seeing the dude)

My ear is sore, i just switched the push-pin used to pierce my ear with jewellery. I guess it's a bit of a stretch, but it shouldn't hurt exquisitely.

I just watched Underworld Evolution- should've stayed up to watch Lady Vengeance instead. Underworld Evolution carried on where the last film left off, with Selena looking hot in skin tight PVC body suit and the werewolf guy missing his shirt for most of the movie. Lotsa fancy guns, implausible moves, smashed faces and gore. That is the reason i watch vampire films- because i love the impossibility of it. It's like a Bollywood thing, but i indulge in fantasies of superhuman strengh and black leather.

Let me explain the "bollywood thing'. Have you heard of the story about the cinema in india that got burnt down because the film that was shown had a sad ending? The "Bollywood thing" is that some people watch films to escape from reality. Reality is ugly, painful, uncomfortable and sad- the reason of spending money on a film is to escape, for 3 hours, to a wonderful celluloid fantasy world where all is beautiful and ends well. The fantasy is usually of beauty, wealth and glamour. Not to say i dont wish for beauty, wealth and glamour- but i also like black leather.

I also watched 3/4s of Im not scared- a beautiful Italian film. I got hooked while channel surfing because the lead child actor had a beautiful, angelic face and the story about finding a boy trapped at the bottom of a hole and becoming friends is twisted enough to want to watch. Gorgeous scenes of italian countryside and bright colours. The ambiguous ending slightly pissed me off, but i cant ask more of world cinema.

I failed to procure Beirut tickets. I will wish, pray and surf touting websites till 8 May. Maybe i'll get lucky. Warning, digressive thought: Maybe the reason i'm not lucky with men is cos i spend my luck on concert tickets (remember linkin park, astoria?) and exams. That's ok though. I'll let the Big Guy make the plans. Beirut tickets please?

Need to go and do work now- Volver is playing at 11.